Monday, August 8, 2011

Could life get any worse for her?

At my age most teenage girls hate their moms but I have such a close family that i would do anything for her. So my current problem is that she is having the worst time with life. She grew up in an abusive home were she had to cook and clean, and when something wasn't done right her dad would beat her or lock her out of her house for hours. Then when she grew up she married (what she thought was her true love). Together they got through her first two cancers (Hodgkins and cervical) however about two years ago she was again diagnosed with cancer (this time lung). Her husband (not my actual dad) was with her through her surgery and half of her chemo then out of the blue he decides that he wants a divorce. Half way through her chemo he threw us out with no where to go and no money literary we had nothing there was only one person working and that was my sister working a Walmart and that went to the house we finally found. It was a terrible house it was 100+ years old it had black mold everywhere there were gaps between the floor boards and there were gaps between the wall and floor and the ceiling even fell down on us.(by the way living with my mom is me my 3 other sisters, my 2 brothers, and my oldest brothers girlfriend who ate everything and didn't give us a dime) we were then kicked out of that house just so the landlord could more his 5 children in it. We then had to move to another house 2 hours away with only enough room for me my mom and my sisters. my brother had to go live with my aunt and uncle and my oldest brother and his girlfriend had to get their own place (which is actually a good thing however he is now living with us till he gets his own apartment) We are currently still living in the same place but having a terrible time keeping up with the bills because once again only one person is working (my oldest brother) and only spending it on himself and not really helping with bills. we are only getting by on the checks that come from my real father for child support and the ex husband for my little sister. she doesn't even have enough money for her medicine that she really needs without them she might die. I really what to help my mom i'm currently trying to find a job and so are my sisters even my mom is and she has only 1 and 1/3 lungs left (from her surgery) and she can hardly lift anything because she still isn't fully healed. I dont know what to do I really what to help and everyday she struggles trying just to give us a better life and no one is here helping her she is the best and I just want her to have a better life without worry and without fear of were we are going to be in the next week or what we are going to eat tomorrow . she gives up the money for her pills just so we are able to be warm and so we can stay here... I pray every night for something to come to make life better but still here we are...here she is trying to do the best for us.I don't know what to do Please just give me some advice someone i don't know what to do we just need so much help. I know life could be worse and i know that there are people out there that have it worse and i try to think of them and how good i have it and i know i do but i still cant help but think of my family and my mom. My mom is so strong she tries her best to hid her pain and sadness but it comes out at some points she even wishes that she would die just because she thinks that everyone's lives would be better.I just want her to be happy and safe because i wont always be in this house with her. Its like no matter where she goes its still a living hell for her. even in her marriage. in 2003 every night they would fight because he would be so intoxicated. He even attempted to run her over with a van. Throughout the marriage he cheated on her. even after the split he bad mouthed her told lies about her to the point were he friends decided that they no longer liked her they sided with him. everything he said was a lie. He never even loved her he told that to her he said it was a marriage of convenience. HER LIFE HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT A LIVING HELL WHY DOES IT JUST KEEP GETTING WORSE.its like it will never get better. why lord why us why her she doesn't deserve this pain this hatred. I'm sorry this is so long i just need help and i need to vent She has given everything up for her family and friends and this is how it ends up Its not right.Please give me advice.

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